By Vikki Hopes – Abbotsford News
Published: July 27, 2009 4:00 PM
Updated: July 27, 2009 4:09 PM
Sid Bos needed a kidney, but chances were that he was going to die waiting.
His blood type was O negative and, with only seven per cent of the population having the same type, finding a match wasn’t going to be easy. There were no family members who could help.
But Sid didn’t count on the selflessness of his friend Venessa or on the hands of fate.
The first thing Sid noticed was the fatigue. He had never felt so tired. He was a building contractor, and he had always been brimming with energy. But now by 10 a.m., whenever he was behind the wheel of his vehicle, he felt like he was going to fall asleep.
Sid consulted with his doctor, and the only other symptom he had was a spike in his blood pressure.
His health continued to decline and by 1998, at the age of 49, there was a diagnosis – a rare kidney disorder called focal segmental glomerulonephritis, which affects only about seven people per million.
In short, it meant that Sid’s kidneys were failing. His doctor estimated he would require dialysis within a year. It took only six months.
Sid first met Venessa in 1997. She attended a dental assistant program with a woman who rented a room in Sid’s house. They – along with others in the class – often studied together in Sid’s home.
Sid, single at the time, saw himself as “the old guy in the house,” but a bond developed between him and Venessa. He liked her quiet, studious nature, and they discovered they had common interests.
Sid’s tenant moved out, and Venessa continued to come over and visit. The pair watched hockey together or worked on Sid’s garden.
When Sid was first diagnosed, he did not share the news with any family or friends, not even Venessa. She did not have an inkling of his health issues until he told her he required dialysis.
Through this, their conversations became more personal, and their relationship deepened. Venessa, 20, and Sid, 50, fell in love.
Sid tried not to let his condition slow him down. He was on a form of dialysis, called “peritoneal,” that enabled him to perform the procedure at home or on the road. He was an avid golfer, and he even carted all his equipment along during golf trips with his buddies.
But he was getting sicker, and Venessa could see the toll it was taking. Sid was on the waiting list for a kidney, but it could be years before his name moved to the top and a matching donor was found.
Venessa told her dad that she was going to get her blood tested to see if she had the same type as Sid.
She showed up at Sid’s house shortly afterwards.
“I had my blood tested and I’m O negative,” she told him.
Venessa then announced that she wanted to donate a kidney to Sid.
“You sure you want to do this? You really have to think about this hard,” he said.
Venessa was certain.
The pair then informed the BC Transplant Society, and about six months of medical tests followed to ensure they were a suitable match.
Doctors were astounded at the results. On the tissue matching, they met four out of the five criteria – rare to find even among blood relatives. Overall, the pair were found to be a 97 per cent genetic match – so close that one doctor warned them against having children together.
The transplant took place on May 3, 2000. The only complication was that once the transplant was completed, doctors had to perform a second surgery on Sid due to problems with urine drainage.
When he awoke from the anesthetic, he felt like a million bucks. The first thing he wanted was a peanut butter sandwich.
Four hours later, he hobbled down two corridors in the hospital to visit Venessa, who was taking longer to recover.
Sid was released from hospital within three days; Venessa within five. Sid was back golfing six weeks after his surgery, around the same time that Venessa returned to her dental assistant job.
Neither one has had any complications in the nine years since the procedure. Sid later discovered that an aunt had the same rare kidney condition. She had a transplant and died 19 years later at the age of 89.
Sid and Venessa were married on Sept. 1, 2004 in Invermere. They went through genetic testing to see if having children was advisable.
Their son, Linden, was born on July 2, 2006 — a little brother for Sid’s 33-year-old daughter from a previous marriage.
Sid is grateful to have the experience of raising another child. If it wasn’t for Venessa, he might never have seen that day.
“The most important day of my life was when I met this lady,” he says.
Abbotsford is one of 14 communities around B.C. taking part in the Kidney Foundation’s second annual Give the Gift of Life Walk on Sunday, Aug. 9.
The walk begins at 11 a.m. at Gardner Park on Livingston Road.
Participants walk to raise funds for research, patient programs and services, and organ donation awareness.
“It’s so important for us to raise awareness of the need for kidney health in addition to raising funds that support the work of the foundation, and walks like this one fulfill both objectives perfectly,” said Pia Schindler, the Kidney Foundation’s director of development.
For more information or to register, visit kidney.bc.ca/walk or call Lois Wilson at 604-856-8218 or Riley Weiss at 604- 854-3401.